TSA agents have a pretty thankless job; you only hear about their failures rather than the monumental task they have of keeping us safe by stopping deadly items from being brought onto planes.
Sure, they stop a lot of guns, knives, potential explosives, and the like from getting through security checkpoints – but they also seize their fair share of some very weird items. Here are 10 of the strangest items TSA agents have stopped passengers from bringing aboard a plane.
1. A Sex Toy Sampler Pack – A Redditor whose uncle is a TSA agent shared this gem, “My uncle once had to hand inspect a case full of various sized dildos because one of the dogs smelled something funny.”
2. Fake Body Parts – An agent describes a time a passenger was stopped from going on a plane because he had a suitcase full of female mannequin parts, head, body, etc., all taken apart. Apparently, security thought he was smuggling drugs; it just turned out he liked mannequins. At least they were not real body parts!
3. Pounds of Poop – While there is no law strictly forbidding it, TSA agents in Alaska detained a passenger who was trying to board a flight with a giant bag of moose feces. “While TSA has no policies that would prevent you from traveling with a bag of animal poo, we would strongly suggest that you check with your airline on their policies. Several carriers do have rules in place to avoid smelly situations aboard their planes. Besides, having to leave your souvenirs behind would really stink,” wrote the TSA.
4. Snakes on a Plane – Maybe this motherf*cker never saw the movie. A “harmless 15-inch ring-necked snake” was left behind at Newark’s security checkpoint when a passenger was barred from going through security by TSA with the little serpent. Port Authority Police was called to take him to safety.
5. …and Speaking of Reptiles – “Good lord, we find lots of weird/unusual things that a normal person would never ever need. I’m sure if I kept thinking, I’d think of something better, but this stands out right now — a young child, about 12, had recently returned from South America with his family and ended up going through the body scanner, and we found six small turtles in his cargo pants pockets. Border security was called in, the turtles had to be taken and tested for foreign diseases, and his parents were fined $2,000.” A TSA agent wrote in response to “what was the strangest item you saw a passenger try to sneak on a plane?”
6. Power Tools – One TSA agent reports that he had a passenger ask, “‘I can take a chainsaw through if I empty out the gas, right?’ I just stared at him for a long time.” The agent did not say, but we assume this was probably an airport in Texas!
7. Toilet Paper Gun – A traveler had a novelty toilet paper holder shaped like a six-gun confiscated. The TSA wrote, “Just because you can’t shoot any bullets out of this toilet paper roll doesn’t mean it’s allowed. Replica weapons aren’t allowed in any capacity because they could potentially cause some major delays during screening.”
8. A Machete – One TSA agent reports a man who had a “well-worn and dirty” machete in his backpack. When asked about it, the man replied, “Ok, sorry, just take it; I have a few more just like it at home.”
9. A Meth Burrito – A meth burrito was caught at Hobby International Airport in Texas. It’s probably the item that raised the most eyebrows. It is, in fact, exactly what it says. A burrito with crystal meth stuffed in it. Eagle-eyed TSA agents spotted “something dark and unusual” in a breakfast burrito. A passenger had it in their carry-on luggage. Amid the eggs, cheese, and meat, they found crystal meth. The waste of a good burrito should be a crime in itself!
10. The tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth – A TSA agent reports, “I once had a request for a private screening, which we usually took to mean that we were about to see something weird. The bag was incredibly heavy. After we go behind a curtained-off area, the passengers show me six blocks of mixed metal, four huge bags of random pieces of gold, and two bags of human teeth. Apparently, the couple made a killing off of buying teeth from a crematorium, melting out the fillings, and selling the resulting metal. It smelled really bad.”